Rude awakenings

Since i last wrote there have been countless events and stories, and it has been very eventful. Upon leaving Memphis, I journeyed my way across the great state of Tennessee to the outdoor playground of Chattanooga. Basically since i left Denver the pattern has been that while i am visiting people and staying in a house the weather is as beautiful as it can get, but once i leave to go camping (which has turned into just finding a place to park my truck) mother nature unleashes her fury and sets forth monsoons directly over the cities i am visiting. When i make my complaint to a local the response is always the same "yeah, this weather sure is sumpin'. I don' 'spose it's rained in these parts for a good 3-4 weeks" (remember i am in the south so you can feel free to add an accent). The departure from Memphis was no different, i wasn't all that surprised (although now its expected to rain once i go out on my own) when the rain started to fall down after a couple hours or so of driving. In the south the rain doesn't fall like it does up in Oregon, down here it comes down in droves, in sheets, drops the size of cannon balls falling like the wrath unleashed at Gettysburg. The rain falls in such abundance that even as the windshield wipers go full speed everything still looks like it does when you open your eyes underwater, or better when your a little kid (or, lets be honest here, an adult) cry uncontrollably but you don't blink your eyes.

On the way to Chattanooga the unrelenting storm began, but this time there was lightning! It was beautiful at first, and then a little scary, and finally just annoying. The lightning started after a couple hours of perpetual rain and since i departed late from Memphis it was illuminating the night sky like disco strobe. I pulled int the the great city at about 11 and the lightning was in full force. I can't really remember ever being startled by the lightning but this night i was. I found a nice clean park down by the river to set up camp, i think it was a city park, and went through my bedtime rituals. I got in bed and the rain was pouring down. In the canopy of my truck the aluminum sheet metal that makes the roof amplifies each raindrop to sound like that of a 10 pound sledge. I don't say this to complain, but it is a fact. It took me a minute but sure enough i fell asleep in the downpour and was enjoying some great rest when it struck. I don't know where the lightning struck down, but the thunder was a crack so loud that i sat straight up with a gasp, with my heart racing it took me a while to figure out what the hell the noise was. Needless to say i slept a little uneasy that night.

The Next night, after spending a day in the thriving metropolis, i pulled myself into the same parking spot as the night before and decided it would be a great place to camp out. After the nightly routine of brushing my teeth and fumbling around doing small tasks that don't really serve any benefit other than keeping me busy, i climbed into bed to enjoy a full nights sleep. After dosing off a little, the rain started again and brought me back from the middle grounds between sleep and being awake. This was a small set back, i simply closed all the windows and fell promptly into a coma. Next thing i knew there was a huge banging on the back window, startled my hand dropped to my rifle, but i stopped myself from grabbing it. Something didn't add up. Since when did burglars warn you before entering? When did they start shining flashlights in your eyes? And when the hell did they get matching uniforms, utility belts and badges? Oh shit, the police. I opened the back door and pulled myself to the edge of the opening. I talked with the officers for a few minutes and then realized i was chatting with them in my underwear. "officer, do you mind if i put some pants and a shirt on"? They let me, and we concluded our discussion as civil, dressed individuals. They were nice and thought i was a goofy kid. I guess they saw my car the night before and since it was in the same spot the wanted to check it out. They let me go but said i had to leave. It was about 3 in the morning and so i just pulled into a grocery store parking lot and fell asleep again. A couple hours later i awoke to a loud mechanized roar and spotlights shining in the side window. I was parked facing a curb and here roared a street sweeper about to t-bone my sorry ass. I covered my face with a blanket, as if that would help, and cringed. It passed by an inch and i was terrified. once i realized what was going on i chilled out a little, but i had just seen my life flash before my eyes. The truck didn't stop there, it did about 5,000 trips around the parking lot, and i hardly fell asleep after that.

The best part is that all the while i was laughing at my predicament and still in great spirits. that seems to be the story of my trip, despite circumstance it all remains fun. Viva la Vida!

Cheers,

Tony